By Colin Heston

With an obvious nod to Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, Colin Heston takes us inside the most mysterious of institutions The University, inhabited by many weird academics and administrators, not to mention students. William Hobson, Thomas Colmes’s trusted assistant, recounts the strange and challenging cases that arose among the inhabitants of the Ivory Tower in which they both reside, their offices deep in its basement. Hobson is not quite a doctor (ABD – All But Dissertation) and Colmes’s past is itself a mystery. But never before have the shenanigans and conundrums of academic life in a university been uncovered with such courage and thoroughness, the hallmarks of Colmes’s brilliance.

NY. Read-Me.Org.

By Bill Bryson

FROM CHAPTER 1: “In the late summer of 1996, an old journalist friend from London named Simon Kelner called me in New Hampshire, to where I had lately moved after living for twenty-some years in Britain. Simon had recently been made editor of Night& Day magazine, a supplement ofthe Mail on Sunday newspaper, and it was his idea that I should write a weekly column for him on America. At various times over the years Simon had persuaded me to do all kinds of work that I didn't have time to do, but this was way out of the question.

"No," I said. "I can't. I'm sorry. It's just not possible. I've got too much on."

"So can you start next week?"

"Simon, you don't seem tounderstand. I can't do it."

"We thought we'd call it 'Notes from a Big Country.'" "Simon, you'll have to call it 'Big Blank Space in the Magazine' because I cannot do it."

NY. Broadway Books. 1999. 299p.

By Colin Heston

In this collection of short stories, follow the exploits of supreme psychiatrist and criminologist  Franco Ferrapotti as he weaves a web of intrigue in the labyrinths of the United Nations and the surreal world of Italian politics, big money, and of course, the Vatican. Other stories of high achievement explore the ancient origin of the animal species and gendered humans, the exciting zoo of enlightenment installed on the island that once housed Alcatraz, making it into the dream University of the Chosen, or if you prefer, getting elected the new Secretary General of the United Nations. But that’s not all. Get a brief glimpse of the future where precision doctors edit who you are or who you want to be. These stories originally appeared as part of the poipular Friday Story series offered free by Read-Me.Org on its web site during 2022-2023.

NY & Philadelphia. Read-Me.Org. Paperback. 2023. 147p. All proceeds go to Read-Me.org

By Colin Heston. Illustrations by Graeme Newman

29 short stories inspired by the vicissitudes of punishment in all its forms, its deliverers and recipients. Its universality across cultures and at every level of social life from the kitchen to the battlefield never ceases to amaze. The stories unveil the diverse motives and excuses for punishment that paradoxically form the foundation of that great shibboleth of humanity:  justice. The stories range through childhood spats to military encounters, , family discourse and dysfunction, to the puzzle of how criminal justice manages to match a punishment to its respective crime (it can't). Taken together, the stories ask one seemingly silly question of human history: which came first, the crime or the punishment? The stories first appeared in the popular Friday Stories series published every other Friday on Read-Me.Org beginning in 2021 and continuing through 2022.

NY and Philadelphia. Read-Me.Org. 2023. 283p. Paperback. All proceeds donated to Read-Me.Org.

By Charles Dickens

From Wikipedia: Our Mutual Friend, written in 1864–1865, is the last novel completed by Charles Dickens and is one of his most sophisticated works, combining savage satire with social analysis. It centres on, in the words of critic J. Hillis Miller, quoting the book's character Bella Wilfer, "money, money, money, and what money can make of life".[1]

Most reviewers in the 1860s continued to praise Dickens's skill as a writer in general, but did not review this novel in detail. Some found the plot both too complex and not well laid out.[2] The Times of London found the first few chapters did not draw the reader into the characters. In the 20th century, however, reviewers began to find much to approve in the later novels of Dickens, including Our Mutual Friend.[3] In the late 20th and early 21st centuries, some reviewers suggested that Dickens was, in fact, experimenting with structure,[4][5] and that the characters considered somewhat flat and not recognized by the contemporary reviewers[6] were meant rather to be true representations of the Victorian working class and the key to understanding the structure of the society depicted by Dickens in the novel.[6][7]

London. Chapman & Hall. 1865. 970p.

By Charles Dickens

From Wikipedia: Little Dorrit is a novel by Charles Dickens, originally published in serial form between 1855 and 1857. The story features Amy Dorrit, youngest child of her family, born and raised in the Marshalsea prison for debtors in London. Arthur Clennam encounters her after returning home from a 20-year absence, ready to begin his life anew.

The novel satirises some shortcomings of both government and society, including the institution of debtors' prisons, where debtors were imprisoned, unable to work and yet incarcerated until they had repaid their debts. The prison in this case is the Marshalsea, where Dickens's own father had been imprisoned. Dickens is also critical of the impotent bureaucracy of the British government, in this novel in the form of the fictional "Circumlocution Office". Dickens also satirises the stratification of society that results from the British class system.

Bradbury and Evans. 1857. 995p.

By Steele Rudd

"We want a man," Fahey added, "who'll go to Brisbane an' put the sufferances of the farmers plainly an'— an'—well before Parliament—a man who'll talk t' thim, an' talk straightforredly t' thim, an'—an'—tell thim what's right an'—an' what ought t' be done. An' there's no one can do it better'n yeou."

Dad stared at the floor in silence. He seemed impressed with Fahey's argument.

So began Dad's career in Politics, and although he doesn't know much about Parliamentary protocol, he is determined to have his say; his spectacular entry into the House, his subsequent brushes with the long-suffering Speaker, and portraits of the Member for Fillemupagen, the Minister for Lands, the Premier and the Treasurer, and the "Chesterfield", make this one of the wittiest criticisms of its kind. The book was written not long after Rudd had been retrenched from the Public Service, and he worked off a personal grudge by making many of his characters clearly recognizable among the State politicians of the day—small wonder that there were moves to have him called before the bar of the house and disciplined.

Steele Rudd's works are now part of the Australian image, and his chief heroes, Dad and Dave, part of the Australian myth. They have, unhappily, been out of print for a long time, and a whole generation has grown up without knowing characters who were a household word to their parents and grandparents. People who have never read Steele Rudd can now appreciate a unique part of the Australian heritage; and those who do know his characters will doubtless be glad to renew old acquaintances and memories.

Sydney. Bookstall. 1908. 304p.

By Ambrose Bierce

From the Preface: The Devil's Dictionary was begun in a weekly paper in 1881, and was continued in a desultory way and at long intervals until 1906. In that year a large part of it was published in covers with the title The Cynic's Word Book, a name which the author had not the power to reject nor the happiness to approve. To quote the publishers of the present work: “This more reverent title had previously been forced upon him by the religious scruples of the last newspaper in which a part of the work had appeared, with the natural consequence that when it came out in covers the country already had been flooded by its imitators with a score of‘cynic’ books - The Cynic’s This, The Cynic's That and The Cynic's t’Other. Most of these books were merely stupid, though some of them added the distinction of silliness. Among them, they brought the word ‘cynic’ into disfavour so deep that any book bearing it was discredited in advance of publication.”

Hertfordshire. Wordsworth Editions Limited. 1996. 243p.

By Digby Anderson

A dictionary like no other!

"This book will shortly replace a university;education and it's cheaper." John Cleese.

The dictionary of dangerous words from access to zionist via exclusion, partner and self-esteem.

Contributors: Alice Thomas, Ellis Frederick Forsyth, Simon Heffer, Peter Hitchens, Andrew Roberts, Auberon Waugh, Michael Wharton, and many Others

London. Social Affairs Unit. No Date. 129p.

By Nino Culotta

From the cover: Cop This Lot by Nino Culotta (John O’Grady) is the hilarious sequel to the well-known They’re a Weird Mob. In Cop This Lot we enjoy once more the magnificent humour that comes from genuine Australian dialogue, and the lovable charac­ter of Nino, the friendly Italian migrant bent on becoming a 'dinkum Aussie’. A new note of hilarity is reached when Nino’s workmates, Joe and Dennis, accompany him on a visit to Nino’s parents in Italy. Their struggles with the Continental way of life enable Nino to get his own back, and provide countless laughs for the reader. Illustrated by WEP

Sydney. Ure Smith. 1960. 216p.